Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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