we have pet lesbian snakes
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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