Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Randomize
