the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Randomize
