Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
