thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
