let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
40s are totally the cure
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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