pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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