When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
tell me about the fingering
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
