LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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