So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
Slut skills are useful in every country.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
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