somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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