a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
