Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize