Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
we made out on top of his cat.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
Randomize
