I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize