i think i have herpe
just one?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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