At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
