She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
high people should be assigned attendants
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
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