just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
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