i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
It's just like the Real World with babies
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
