google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
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