Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I just saw a pregnant woman with a cigarette and a beer walking into the Larry the Cable Guy show. I'm glad my taxes are paying her medical expenses.
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
