First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
