I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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