I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
