Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
