why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
i think i scared a bird with my dick
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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