Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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