Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
