Screwed.edu
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
