Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
Randomize
