Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
