Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
nothing says "functioning mature adult" like sneaking beer out of your mom's fridge in a lunchbox
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
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