Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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