U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
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