No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
