Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Holy sore nipples Batman
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
