Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Come share oat with me in your robe
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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