i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
