It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
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