I feel like I'm in dance class right now
I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Randomize
