I'm so fucking centered right now
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
