He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
