I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
