Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Never underestimate the power of titties
Randomize
