All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
