Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
