Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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