Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Randomize
